In order to bloom…

“The day I lost you, I also lost me. I’ve been trying to find myself again, but it’s hard. It’s hard because you were a huge part of my life. Not having you here is so painful, I’m just not me anymore.” ~unknown Those who have lost a spouse, spend a significant amount of timeContinue reading “In order to bloom…”

“I am sorry for your loss…”

“I am sorry for your loss.” I have said it myself many times, and continue to say it myself to this day. After a significant loss, this is a phrase you will hear it over and over, and for many years to come. It is uncomfortable, and even 8 years later, I am not usedContinue reading ““I am sorry for your loss…””

The WHY is not your friend.

When someone passes away, whether expected or unexpected, people always ask why? I don’t mean how, it is also natural to ask how a person dies, but instead I mean why? Why did God, or the Universe, take this person away? Widows and widowers, especially, get caught up in the WHY? Why did this happen?Continue reading “The WHY is not your friend.”

Dirty Little Secrets, Two Faces of Grief

There are things people never talk about, never discuss, things that people don’t want to admit or talk about regarding grief, grief has two faces. No one tells you about all the things that come up, the “red tape” that clogs your days and that you are forced to deal with ON TOP of grievingContinue reading “Dirty Little Secrets, Two Faces of Grief”

Everything is different, EVERY SINGLE THING.

Loss of a loved one rocks your world. Anyone who has lost a parent, sibling, or close friend can attest to that… Now speak to a widow or widower…Literally everything thing changes…EVERY SINGLE THING! Death of a spouse is different from other forms of grief and loss that you may or have or you willContinue reading “Everything is different, EVERY SINGLE THING.”

Grieving on Social Media

It is a choice…to choose to grieve publicly or privately. Navigating social media can be a treacherous and and slippery slope on a good day, so proceed carefully and with forethought. There are pitfalls to social media when grieving. Please be warned that there will always be critics and fall out to your activity onContinue reading “Grieving on Social Media”

Don’t take grief so seriously

Sometimes in grief people get easily offended, judged, and are quick to have their feelings hurt. They often times block out their friends and family, believing them to be judgmental, inconsiderate, and insensitive. But I am throwing the challenge out there, are your friends and family intentionally being insensitive, or are you (in your grief-strickenContinue reading “Don’t take grief so seriously”

Give yourself permission

Grief is a wild, weird, worried, and wacky journey. With that said, you need to grant yourself permission. Permission to grieve, allow yourself those quiet times of self pity, where you allow yourself to feel all of the raw emotion. You are entitled to your feelings, just try not to hang out in that darkContinue reading “Give yourself permission”

Give yourself a break

Everyone deserves a break, to reinvigorate themselves, or get ready for battle, to gain some new perspective, or to just simply get some rest. There is no rule, written or unwritten, that says a widow or widower needs to live in a state of depression, or remain at the bottom of a downward spiral. GiveContinue reading “Give yourself a break”